The Dark Days of November 2008...

I still remember that terrible Wednesday evening of 2008. Even though I’m thousands of miles away from Mumbai city now…

It’s vivid and it seems like just yesterday!

A split second, a minute and a few hours can change people's lives forever...

It was evening and not surprisingly I was busy on the computer writing and doing some intellectual chat online. Well, during those days, that was the one place where I got to do some intelligent and wise discussions!

After a light dinner we had just decided to go down and get some fresh air( one of the few benefits of living near the sea in that polluted city). Just then a message alert from a PR colleague said: "Terrorist attack in Mumbai. Gun fire and shoot out in several places. Ensure your own safety and don’t go out."

Of course as soon as I heard I decided to put on the TV and saw it all live- the chaos, one( probably a terrorist) lying lifeless on the street, a wing, almost a whole side of the grand Taj Mahal hotel burning, the police at work ,the chaos, an NRI giving an interview as to how the ones with British and American passports were held up at the Taj Mahal Hotel and so on.


A small time movie ‘A Wednesday’ had just released and I had edited the review for the website I was working for in September of that year. The movie told the story of a planned terrorist attack and this happened in real life just two months later…


Fact is stranger than fiction indeed!

Of course calls of a few well wishers came throughout the night. I thanked God I was doing okay and so were some people I cared about.

The next day it was all about reading the sad carnage in the papers and watching the live action. The terror would go on for 60 long hours making it one of the worst attacks of recent times.

Eight of the attacks occurred in South Mumbai: at Chhatrapati Shivaji Terminus, the Oberoi Trident, the Taj Mahal Palace & Tower, Leopold Cafe, Cama Hospital, the Orthodox Jewish-owned Nariman House, the Metro Cinema, and a lane behind the Times of India building and St. Xavier’s College. There was also an explosion at Mazagaon, in Mumbai’s port area, and in a taxi at Vile Parle.

I remember visiting the Taj and enjoying the breeze near the Gateway of India with a few others only a month earlier- October 2008. Nariman House was visited the same month as well. Life really springs surprises at you!

I couldn't take too much of that kind of negativity. I was trying to stay away from most of the live coverages.Now I think I should have. Simply because it would have invoked more pathos in me and helped me to handle the situations after the incident better. One can't afford to shy away from the harsh realities of life.



Sad stories of some brave Mumbai policemen who fell while overpowering the terrorists, many innocent citizens and foreigners(who were largely targeted)losing their lives were all over.

A policeman was unarmed and took bullets to his chest, just to capture the lone surviving terrorist.It was an unthinkable self sacrifice to hold on, just to capture the man who was going berserk killing people.His capture could only prove the links to the attacks without which nothing would have been proved.

He is a huge hero- Shaheed Tukaram Omble.

http://blogs.hindustantimes.com/singly-political/2010/11/26/a-martyr-and-a-terrorist/

The lion of a man is one of the most talked about martyrs of the event today. He's being honored now. His wife and daughters will still feel the loss forever.One of the daughters said as an Indian she would be proud of what he did,but as a daughter she wished her father hadn't been so brave and saved himself.



People were still awaiting news from their loved ones who dined at the Trident hotel.

Later actor Ashish Choudhury wrote an open letter filled with anguish and anger when after a few days of waiting he found out his sister and brother-in-law didn’t make it.

I still feel pangs of grief for the young brave-heart, NSG commando,Major Unnikrishnan who gave away his life a day or so later in the course of the operation to protect the city and to save the hostages in the Taj Mahal hotel.

Net users later got mails with his happy casual pics from a personal holiday just a few months back from a social networking site.

He was a happy-go-lucky young man next door, our friendly neighborhood guy who was extra ordinary and whose selflessness and sacrifice seems so out of the world in this materialistic world. A truly great man, so out of the world.

No amount of compensation and tears are enough for a sacrifice like that. He didn't need to do that, he could have chosen to live life like anyone his age. Instead he decided to protect people he didn't even know. A kind of attitude which is hardly found anywhere around.

He still lives on in the memories of the ones who really care...

http://www.binscorner.com/pages/m/meet-the-hero-major-sandeep-unnikrishnan.html

He was the only son of his parents and they are ones in whose hearts the wounds would be fresh the most. His father carries forward his legacy and both parents look quite strong. But it's really hard to fathom the storm going on inside him...

http://www.defence.pk/forums/india-defence/81771-nsg-martyr-major-sandeep-unnikrishnan-s-father-cycles-across-country.html

http://current.com/news/92821001_we-see-god-in-our-son-mother-of-26-11-martyr.htm?xid=RSSfeed



Napoleon Bonaparte, the Emperor of France had once so rightly said,"It is the cause, not the death that makes the martyr."

"When You Go Home, Tell Them Of Us And Say,
For Their Tomorrow, We Gave Our Today"

The words are attributed to John Maxwell Edmonds (1875 -1958) and they are beautiful, profound and mean so much. Yeah, they do...

Well, they are the real heroes because they take harm upon themselves and are the protectors of the most important thing in life- life itself.

How many people would have the courage to do something like that?

Wonder why the majority still love to idolize celluloid heroes and celebs from other walks of life more than these real heroes from real life!

I'm talking about idols from the glam world, sports world, world of politics, and big shot industrialists etc here.I mean some of them do deserve to be idolized but then many are just media made stars.

The non conscious Indian citizen just keep themselves busy with these celebs as it works as a kind of intoxication for them and helps them to escape the realities of life.

When will this basic thing of life change? The aware citizens really need to make some changes and show this reality to the upcoming generations.

As of now the beautiful memories of the martyrs just live on...No words seem enough.



It's nice to see someone take a good initiative and a chance to check out the young brave heart in a digital avatar. A graphical comic book has been released and the true appreciators can look forward to the same.

A soldier can sacrifice his personal safety, his life for strangers and this is a good ode to that kind of bravery.

http://www.mid-day.com/news/2010/nov/251110-martyr-comic-book-Maj-Sandeep-Unnikrishnan-news-Delhi.htm

Major Unnikrishnan, ASI Tukaram Omble, Havildar Gajender Singh were honored with the Ashok Chakra along with a few other brave men and the other martyrs were/ are being rightly honored too.But it's so difficult to get over or forget such valuable losses.

Nothing that has already happened can change but let's try that their sacrifices never go waste. And something good comes out from this constant fight against terrorism in India and around the world.Let not the memories of the most heinous act of cruelty on innocent lives die. And let not these unsung heroes be ever forgotten.

They are not to be made just subjects of modern history books but their supreme sacrifices need to bear fruit.

A few conscious citizens have made it a point to use the media as a tool and educate the people. To never forget martyrs, such as the Mumbai Martyrs and the Kargil martyrs of 1999. May many more people take such initiatives in life.

http://wn.com/Sachin_Tendulkar_emotional_over_death_of_Martyr_Gajendra_Singh




A veteran food critic and writer was attending a wedding and couldn’t make it out of the Taj Mahal hotel safely. An elderly cleaner at the CST railway station became a victim.A railway employee was shot at the station on Nov 26 and his son who was turning a year older that day says he'll never cut a cake for his birthday again.A cab driver's wife now says she'll not rest until the surviving terrorist's death sentence is carried out.

And yes, there were three fishermen of the hijacked Kuber ship which the the monsters used to enter Mumbai. Recently I heard many say that the ship seem haunted.

The rabbi from Israel and his wife were greatly mourned and the nanny who saved their baby son Moshe showed exemplary courage and presence of mind as well.

The poor little boy doesn't yet fathom the seriousness of what happened, where his parents suddenly disappeared...He just kept crying for mommy.

http://www.ndtv.com/article/cities/26-11-best-revenge-will-be-moshe-returning-to-city-as-rabbi-68763




An elderly German couple's dream just ended in the so called city of dreams at the Leopold cafe frequented by intellectual conversation loving people...
http://news.rediff.com/slide-show/2009/nov/25/slide-show-1-anniversary-26-11-dilip-dsouza-on-a-dream-that-ended-sadly.htm

Innocent lives got lost just like that due to the demonic natures of a few.

There were other such heart wrecking stories which kind of brought some people together. Many expressed disgust and sadness also at the administration's failure to protect citizens.

But only for a while…
Just a few days later, without much remorse they seemed to carry on with their lives. Okay, some say it’s the spirit of the city-to carry on bravely after a disaster.

That’s fine but what’s with the vices and nastiness of the majority?

The chief minister of Mumbai resigned but most people in politics and in power remained the same. Later it came out in the news that the bullet proof jackets worn by the ATS( Anti terrorist squad) chief were faulty. Can anything justify that? The administration totally failed the citizens with this event which will always be fresh in memory.

The chief minister of Kerala decided to act and talk cheap when Major Unnikrishnan's emotional father had protested against the politicians'(from Kerala, their home state) irresponsibility and false show of concern.

Corruption in the country is still rampant.

Since it's a huge, huge topic with millions of people involved, we can talk a little bit about on the micro -level.

I personally saw that kind of apathy in a few so called friends who I was forced to be close at that time. They just forgot 26/11 clean and happily showed off their dark side, that too within just 2-6 months!

So did the brave NSG( National Security Guards) men and the Mumbai policemen give away their lives to protect most of these thankless people? While the harmless ones who just do their duty and the protectors suffer and get annihilated, the one who harm innocents for their selfish reasons and for survival go on happily. Sometimes I too wonder what kind of justice the world has?

Maybe the harmful ones get annihilated too, but till then a lot of damage get done.

Some people did have genuine concern but not the majority...

They had seemed to show concern for the people who lost so much in the attacks but later I realized it was just a show. There was no genuine concern or trials to imbibe the noble qualities of the special few.

They were only concerned about themselves( that's okay till a point as it's self preservation but why does that attitude harm others in the process). But they were ready to stoop to any level and harm if there’s a need for them to fulfill their needs.

The terrorists act out of hate and many like that around us do so the same though in a smaller way! They can't control their various vices of envy, greed, ingratitude,arrogance, lust, selfishness, manipulation , ignorance and so on.
And if given a chance they would make the demons in them rise high and take over to make poor innocents suffer! After all, the terror and the violence like the values, start in the mind itself. Once all that is cultivated, it can really become dangerous.


The young major had put hypocrisy, sycophancy, apathy and lack of compassion as turn offs on one of his social network profiles. And majority he sacrificed himself for are still ruled by these terrible vices.It's really so very sad.

Here was a young man(and a few others as well) who gave up his precious life to shield strangers. And the so called normal people around can't even be a little humane and kind to people they know and are supposed to be close to! Just look at the contrast...

By the way, one might wonder why I speak of Major Unni more than anyone else in this post. I do sympathize and feel for the others a lot too, but this young man was so much like the middle class Indian youth that others of his like know of- convent educated, cosmopolitan, from a simple but cultured family, one with ambitions, one who loves to travel, enjoy the movies, life and so on. He seems so much like the guy next door.The difference was that he was far too giving, selfless, patriotic...

The song picturized on Johnny Walker in the 50s has defined the spirit years ago-

Aye dil hai mushkil jeena yahan
Zara hat ke zara bach ke
Ye hai bombay meri jaan

Kahin building kahin traame
kahin motor kahin mill
Milta hai yahan sab kuchh ik milta nahin dil
Kahin building kahin traame
Kahin motor kahin mill
Milta hai yahan sab kuchh ik milta nahin dil
Insaan ka nahin kahin naam o nishaan
Zara hat ke zara bach ke
ye hai bombay meri jaan


The gist of song is that it's easy to find material things in Bombay but not a genuine good heart. It's a difficult city to survive in as you don't find too much humanity in here...

This song was written so many years ago. Yet it superbly describes the city. Wonder how the lyricist knew that attitude would remain the same even after so many years?

It's not too different in other parts of the world as well but Mumbai could easily be one of the front runners. It could also be because of the fact that the city has too many people.It's like in a city of 19.5- 20 million people,roughly 200 suffering isn't such a big deal.


Probably the average person in Mumbai is so caught up with living life that he/ she don't even think about the victims now.


Except for a select few and I really appreciate their efforts. It's good to tell them so and remind their about their special ways. They do stand out in the uncaring crowd.

There are prayer meetings and candle light vigils(even today occasionally) and encouraging words by President Obama some time ago and US secretary of state Hilary Clinton last year in their respective visits to the city. But not much has changed in the average person. Ratan Tata takes the credit for rebuilding the hotel and doing a great bit though.


Anyway, all of it kind of propelled my decision to move out of Mumbai six months after the attack. I so wish I could have moved out 2-3 months earlier only and didn't need to wait out that time period too.

So much of warmth was gone and the hope that human beings had some goodness in them got lost there...

Everywhere around the world there are problems but in a city like that it's worse. I shall explain some reasons which according to me make people so in some of my later posts.

It’s been almost one and a half years since I left the city and then I only went back for a short visit. Thank God for that. The memories remain, but only of the real heroes.When I visit Mumbai again, the Taj Mahal hotel is the place I want to visit to sign the memorial register.

My heart goes out with the ones who made us all(the thankful as well as the thankless ones) feel safe and sleep peacefully by risking their lives. Who did what the soldiers of a country do every day- protect the borders to ensure the safety of the civilians, so that the normal people can sleep peacefully at night.

The citizens just need to do their duties and show solidarity. Let's hope a few more people become sensitive to their environments despite being so caught up in their lives or worse still stuck in their dangerously selfish & ungrateful little worlds.

Babetude salutes the real heroes. Now and forever.RIP-the true heroes.

Maybe they will get justice someday soon as even the scriptures hint at the same...


Ezekiel 25:17
"The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the
inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in
the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of
darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost
children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious
anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know
my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon thee."



I still wish to keep hoping that the unneeded loss of innocent life will come to an end sooner than later in the world. Even when I visited Ground Zero in New York I had the same feeling.



P.S. It was nice to see some of B Town and some leaders remember that day after two years...
http://entertainment.oneindia.in/bollywood/news/2010/bollywood-26-11-mumbai-terror-attack-271110.html
http://www.dnaindia.com/mumbai/report_prithviraj-chavan-pays-tributes-to-26-11-martyrs_1471972
http://www.newkerala.com/news/world/fullnews-92522.html


Babetude requests all readers to please light a candle to recall 26/11 and show that you remember.The link is below-

http://www.indiajaiho.com/LightACandle.htm

And History just repeats itself...

Lines Written In Early Spring
William Wordsworth

I heard a thousand blended notes,
While in a grove I sate reclined,
In that sweet mood when pleasant thoughts
Bring sad thoughts to the mind.
To her fair works did Nature link
The human soul that through me ran;
And much it grieved my heart to think
What man has made of man.


Through primrose tufts, in that green bower,
The periwinkle trailed its wreaths;
And ’tis my faith that every flower
Enjoys the air it breathes.

The birds around me hopped and played,
Their thoughts I cannot measure:—
But the least motion which they made
It seemed a thrill of pleasure.

The budding twigs spread out their fan,
To catch the breezy air;
And I must think, do all I can,
That there was pleasure there.

If this belief from heaven be sent,
If such be Nature’s holy plan,
Have I not reason to lament
What man has made of man?



The source of Wordsworth’s happiness is the harmony that he observes in Nature. He sees, hears, and smells the flowers, the birds, and the trees, and he is delighted because each part of the scene he observes is doing what it is designed to do, and finds satisfaction. Unfortunately, Wordsworth’s happiness is marred by other thoughts.

‘And much it grieved my heart to think

What man has made of man.’

The stark contrast between Nature’s harmony and man’s unhappiness is depressing to Wordsworth. He recognizes that people are unhappy because they do not act in the ways they were meant to act. He believes that society has corrupted individuals and caused them to forget the importance of Nature. In his mind, people have deviated from ‘Nature’s holy plan’ and have renounced a life of simplicity, spontaneity, and beauty for grief and strife. Because of these feelings Wordsworth ends his poem by proclaiming. ‘Have I not reason to lament/What man has made of man?’
It expounds that the reason for man's unhappiness amidst the delicate chain of being in nature, is his pride to think to be greater than what he is, and complain of God's sovereignty.






I still remember reading and later deciphering and answering questions about this famous William Wordsworth poem.


After remembering 26/11 on my last post and going through the news on Tv and web, it's been like an emotional upheaval of sorts for me. The heart feels heavy but one needs to move on like every other emotional and strong person.

Because life is about dealing with human nature…

And the best way to do it is looking at history…


And History repeats itself over and over and over again. Period.

It just that sometimes we don't have the knowledge to realize the same.

Now that I’m older and wiser and not a young teenager as I was when I made my notes at home( without any help from any college or university) to write the eight papers of my History major exams. So though I enjoyed reading the same, I never delved too deep. Or maybe I was just too immature for the same…

I scored good marks but that’s about it…

I coax myself for the same everyday. People like us who grow up on their own but have a humane side need to know all these things, have the knowledge to handle things better in life.


I’m speaking of it after pretty long. Working the frivolous word of Bollywood( even the name is a shameful copy), made my life quite unsubstantial as well.

Not that I wanted to be so. But there was no choice. That’s where my bread and butter was for a couple of years. So interviewing, editing stories of cheap star squabbles, what they do, speak, where they sleep, shop.

As if there was nothing better to do than following the lives of a few people with very little intellectualism.

Watching movies every day first for Sony TV shows and then for reviews every Friday at the theatre . Some of them were unbearable to sit through but I suffered them just because it was my work. Not out of love, mind u.

I’m not saying every movie was bad and there were substantial stuff said and done by the likes of Aamir Khan, and his movies were quite good. But other than that, it was total stagnation. Also the dumb outweigh the bright there.


But quitting that environment has come as a blessing.

I love film history too and like to keep in touch with world cinema. Never had a chance to do that a lot. But now it's nice to blog about it and yes, write a bit of all that in the book I write.

So talking of something substantial as History, one can see a lot and learn a lot…


tudors and human behavior, Russian Rev, French rev, american war of inde,wife of mR.


Or in Cambodia…


While watching the special features on the Judgment at Nuremberg DVD, I viewed the director Stanley Kramer wife’s interview. And she had something on the lines of how one needs to know one's past so that you can handle your present and future better…

This February I had the opportunity to visit the Tower of London. Well it's historical and looks quite nice, and we happily clicked away pics and showed them off later.

Quite later the reality hit me hard. Gosh, this tower had such a bloody history with blood bath being the favorite pass time inside there.



While visiting the London Dungeon, we got a glimpse of what was actually going on there. Delving into the history of London one gets a first hand experience of the gore, the inhuman tortures that were going on just 500- 600 years ago. Hanging people upside them, boiling them, butchering them alive and the perpetrators seem to enjoy it all…

Gosh, it’s pathetic. The cold behavior could beat the o degree Celsius hands down…

Dark history filled with horror stories of poverty, dirt, squalor, plague, fire and murder


I've been a fan of Tudor history. Well, in history everyone would enjoy reading about the Tudors as that’s the most colorful era. So much so that it gets depicted on screen over and over again.


The reigns of Henry V111, Bloody Mary Tudor and the golden age of Elizabeth.

The history books wouldn't delve on the gore as much as the TV shows or the stuff on the net do.



And though I never saw the Tudors on TV, the followed up much of it online and on you tube. It was nicely made but glamorized things quite a bit( that’s understandable) and yes, stayed true to the gore of executions and torture..

On another note, I like Natalie Portman's work but her Anne Boleyn act'The Other Boleyn Girl' has been blasted by most people who know the real history. It was full of made up things and accusations against Anne and George Boleyn which never happened.

Wonder why she decided to be a part of such a faulty film which makes a joke out of history.





People like me already know that you are a good actress Natalie...Leon, the bald act in V for Vendetta, and now Black Swan. Girl you needn't need to do more. Nats I imagine u as Mother Mary, not as a half baked character like that.


In history Queen Anne Boleyn who is the mother of one of the most successful and loved English queens Elizabeth is seen as a victim more than a schemer( though the argument is always on) and so are Mary, Queen of Scots, Marie Antoinette( during the French revolution) Queen Alexandra of Russia( in whose reign the Russian Revolution) happened. Queen Alexandra's daughters and sons for sure became victims of the communist regime.

Guess they were gray characters with their shares of issues, but not compeletely black.


Catherine Howard, another Tudor Queen was the guilty and considered the stupidest girl for playing with fire and having an extra martial affair and premarital fun,even while knowing how vicious the court politics was and how cruel her husband could be. One best example was the fall of her cousin Anne Boleyn. Queen Catherine Howard is portrayed as a complete moron with no self restraint in showtime's 'The Tudors'.

Jane Boleyn made it all possible. This despite both of them knowing that their relative( cousin of Howard and sister- in-law of Lady Rochford) had been falsely implicated and executed only six years before.

Their head rolled soon and guess there are many lessons to be learned from an event like that.

Lady Jane Grey from the Tudor period again was an innocent victim who became a pawn in her families' power games.


By the way,Anne Frank one of the young victims of the Nazi massacre by Hitler had said,
“ I still believe in spite of everything that people are really good at heart.”

But is it actually true. If you look at the majority population of the world, that’s not it… surely not.

Looking at the Killing fields in Cambodia, The Nazi massacre, China, Atom bombs in Hiroshima and Nagasaki.


Looks like it's going on for long- the domination of the weak by the strong. No wonder people have always run after power and riches.

But if you go to look at it, you see so much of it in real life, all around us. It;s just that it takes a while to fathom things and for some, they don't understand it at all.
When I was the gawky little girl and even as late as last year I wondered why people are needlessly mean to each other! Why do they like to pass comments knowingly to make the other person feel small, even when the person concerned is not doing/ saying anything offensive? Worse still, why do things to harm the harmless, who's doing things in his/her space

Then the great realization( it was always there, I just didn't get it) hit me one fine day. Well, it all stems out of envy, resentment, arrogance and the various other vices some people like to cultivate. And once they are nurtured well also thanks to an easy environment for them to grow, company of that sort, it takes over …

The person who attacks usually doesn't have something which the target has. So this mean words and deeds provide some kind of sadistic pleasure to him/ her.


And yes, domination of the weak is another natural human tendency. One someone is at a weak spot, just jump in to make the person even more miserable. It's only a few who sympathise with people who are down and out.

But all this has been going on for ages. If u look at .......u will know. Human behavior, that is is.



Some religious sects say 2012 or at least 2036/37 will change it all. And the new world order of peace and love and goodness will be established. There’ll be heavan on earth as the evil wanes away…

As of now, all that seems like a distant dream. We can only wait and watch.

From Asia, with love...

It was not until recently that I started talking so seriously about martial arts. Kung Fu, karate, judo, Thai kick boxing and so on…

I always knew about the super talented Bruce Lee and yes more so Jackie Chan, Jet Li and Chow Yun Fat who came later on. The east is fantastic as it gave the world martial arts, yoga, Ayurveda, acupressure, Tai Chi, spirituality( in a big way) etc. Yoga, I have done for many years now, but I’m learning about Tai Chi only now.It's really very, very interesting to know so much about the mind body connection, the importance of the spirituality factor in life. That's where the real power lies- in the mind.

This is a continent which gave the world quite a bit in terms of culture. You know why I get to talk about Asia so much now. The last was when I studied Geography is school and it’s been a while since then. I gathered my knowledge(and am thankful for the same) but it was not my favorite subject anyway. It's only after I started staying out of Asia and moved to the American continent, did have more chances to talk about it. That's the irony of it. But it's nice to talk so much about where you come from right now, outside of the country of your birth.

I love to talk about the positive aspects much more than the negative ones. People think I know so much about martial arts.Well I did contemplate taking up karate when I was very little(just wanted to be a tough little girl) but that never materialized.

It's actually mt very someone special who taught me a lot about martial arts and the talk started not very long ago. "You have the strong legs for it and the body too for kung fu", he would say! You know I now really regret not taking it up. I would really have been such a tough girl and it’s important for people to be a little scared and intimidated by you these days! Also it's a great way to stay fit without depending too much on weights etc!

I have become mentally strong and have also taught myself how to not be at a weak spot in life.

But physical strength is a must too! So yes, it would have been really nice to be a karate or kung fu chick.Martial arts experts can also fight injustice and evil not just with words but more literally too!

Now it seems a little late in life to do that...


Anyway most importantly being more Asian and not just conventionally Indian looking has worked to my advantage outside of India.

Well, in northern and western India, they would say I look more oriental, as if from Singapore or Bangkok. Well, not all of them were the same but with some I feel it was more a jibe and it’s nothing great to be like that (as if only the typical Indian looker with a sharp nose is only good enough)!

Many other oriental lookers(especially for whom it was more prominent) would feel it much more. Guess, it was a jibe from from the narrow minded with their limited knowledge of the world! Or maybe sometimes people are so envious and hold underlying resentment towards someone that they it kind of clouds their views and way of speaking!

Anyway, beauty lies in the eye of the beholder.What might be beautiful or even good for some mightn't be good for the other. Of course while making choices, one's class matters!

Okay, not everyone was narrow minded though. My ex roommate, a small time model, a wannabe celeb said I am and could be more international( here I'm happily representing my kind as well) than Indian.

Well, what she said a few years back, became a reality now.

Also some nicer folks in India and Mumbai appreciated my exotic look in the last few years and it's nice to know that at least some with a broadminded outlook. Maybe being from media and the constant education made them so.

But there were some guys who admitted they were attracted to me but I felt they couldn't figure out properly what the heck made them feel so! Guess that's because they weren't clearheaded and it isn't a good thing at all!

By the way, I'm saying all this for the sake of it. Thankfully I have been knowledgeable enough and by the grace of God continue to gather even more wisdom as the days go by. I want to be content in my own space and not get swayed by the opinions of others. So jibes/ criticism or compliments, I feel the same.

And as I said, I strongly believe in the saying, "Beauty lies in the eye of the beholder. It's just that some people have genuine reasons to find someone beautiful or ugly while others have none and are influenced by emotions- lust, fascination, envy et al.

Anyway, a few have often wondered( even when I was in Mumbai) how I managed to look so different in all my modelling pics. A little make up and hair change and I would change!

Even in normal pics my look changes, depending on the lighting and background etc. I was called the chameleon and I would graciously call myself the master of disguise. It's like literally following and living according to the very famous Shakespeare quote,"All the world's a stage and we're all actors and actresses" .

“I think you are either Mexican or Egyptian”, said a very pleasant bartender at a restaurant in New Jersey a year back.

Before that in this Caribbean island people often wondered and asked me as to what kind of an interesting mix I am! "You seem to be from the western world. Did you study in America? You dress up so well', they would ask. That I owe teachers in school as well the internet, international movies and of course my work in the media! By the way,I stayed in an Indian metro city called Mumbai as a media person for a while,so I know a bit of style. No big deal!

Once before even these real life experiences, a well wisher who’s quite the world traveler had said after looking at some pics of mine, “Oh, she looks more Brazilian than Bollywood which is so typical and boring.” And some more people had recently said,"She looks as if she's from Venezuela? She speaks Spanish, right?"

And I would like to just take a bow. Thank you everyone for your unbiased views. Maybe yours truly has a kind of physique, brown hair, exotic light brown eyes and a nice tan which makes them feel she's more Hispanic than Indian.

Ummm...I remember being the short haired, very skinny, gawky kid not too long ago.It's nice to have come a long way since then! I've been called the exotic looker many times and I thank God for that! From a little tart to an exotic damsel.Come a long way...

Plus that gives me inspiration to learn another language. Not bad at all! And I and a few other aware people from India too, find Latin hottie Jessica Alba absolutely stunning. And yes, Shakira and Salma Hayek too as well as supermodels Gisele Bundchen, Adriana Lima and Alessandra Ambrosio.

J lo, Eva Longoria, Eva Mendes etc have made some news too!

Check a picture of Jessica Alba and her gorgeous olive skin and unconventional good looks- it must have come as a whiff of fresh air when she and the likes of her got mainstream type of fame in Hollywood.




The fashionista can look effortlessly sexy even in casuals.

And even hotter when she plays Mommy to daughter Honor.

And in a personal way, I've liked Panama born(smaller star) Jordana Brewster's ('The Fast and the Furious' was one of her better known movies)features, pretty tanned skin and style, which has been a hit with me for years.


And a kind old lady said I look very Polynesian-Hawaiian to be precise. I love Hawaii and used to always dream of going there especially after loving the classic ‘From here to Eternity’ so much. I love the sea and it's my dream destination. That gives me more justification, right? Dress up in coconut leaves skirts, the pretty garlands and the floral head gear. It would be nice to take pictures like that with the beautiful beaches as the backdrop!

Dream, dream, dream...all I have to do is dream...( Courtesy- The Everly brothers)



After hearing so much of all this from non Indians over the last two years and so, I kind of felt I should have been like Lou Diamond Philips. Gosh, I could have been his sister or niece!

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Maybe I would have played various types of roles on celluloid just like him, inspired by him. That would have cut my struggle in life so much!! Man, I wish I was that lucky.

But one thing remains certain, I gel better and am more suited in the more cosmopolitan society here.I wanted to shift to California almost 7 years back( sadly it didn't pan out then but I'm glad I always knew myself and was aware of what was good for me) and am really thankful I could move to the western world if not exactly California.

Better late than never.I always prefer the broad minded outlook. But yes, I'm very much an individualitic person who developed a definite set of views over the years. So I love to preserve my Asian morality, ethics, and spirituality in the western world! That's like enjoying the best of both worlds.

But It's really nice to be more international than Indian, and not just belong to one country, but to the world. I'm proud to be an Indian, and I love to imbibe the good things from my culture and hold them close to my heart forever.

Now most people have the dream of travelling the world or being a called a global citizen. It doesn't always come true for all but many would appreciate it.

But jokes apart ,vanity isn’t my thing at all.I would like others to compliment me instead of doing it myself( it's so very silly to blow one's own trumpet!) Modesty and humility are signs of strength not weakness though many don't admit it.

But today’s discussion is important in more ways than one.

It’s meant to broaden one’s outlook. I for one never have or had anything against the sharp nosed, typical Indian beauty; I appreciate beauty as a whole. And as a good journo, I have always been unbiased and it shows here on my various posts as well. My mother though isn’t that kind. I picked up the finer things including values from the country of my birth.

She strongly thinks that 'the north east of India has been ignored big time by the centre Indian central government)'. Amongst other things, the not typical looking Indian girl( more oriental) is not treated well enough in the entertainment world.

As far as actresses and celebs are concerned, Freida Pinto who made splashes worldwide talked about how she didn’t get too many roles in India( she was apparently called flat chested, dark and all that) before ‘Slumdog Millionaire’ happened. Well she must have had Portuguese ancestors from Goa, India and hence she has the exotic look. That has stood her in good stead internationally and made her so very famous all over!

No wonder model/ actress Koena Mitra is getting much more adulation in LA and San Francisco than in Bollywood. The exotic look must have worked in her favor in the west!

And yes of course, big Indian star Aishwarya Rai Bachchan. She can morph into various characters regardless of its nationality and this can very well explain the international movies in her kitty- 'The Last Legion', 'Pink Panther 2' etc.It's another matter though that none of movies made her a big international star.

Some fools (ain't an understatement here) in my country of birth think that becoming fair is enough or maybe conventional sharp nosed Indian looking etc will make them good.Even though there were attractive dusky actresses there doing well too from a long time,more so since the 1990s.

A part of the elite have however asked the public not to have the obsession to be just fair. This came up last year when Aishwarya Rai Bachchan said she didn't want to advertise a fairness cream for L'Oreal. There was a story not too long ago when some people damaged their skin badly during treatments in their quest to become fair. Guess, the obsession is from the many years of living under British rule. The country became independent in 1947 but many things remain the same… Well, the genes remain the same, that's the reason why.

Being fit and exercising is so important, not only to look good but for overall health as well. Having a well proportioned body is so very important and thankfully after globalization the modeling world and B- town has changed the mindset a bit! But still there’s a long way to go. Toned legs, a slim waistline et al one needs to have and not just a big heaving bosom…


Remember the Shakira lyrics from almost 9 years back- "Lucky that my breasts are small and humble So you don't confuse them with mountains Lucky I have strong legs like my mother To run for cover when i need it ..."( Courtesy- Whenever Wherever) 'Next to her cheap silicon I look minimal That's why in front of your eyes I'm invisible But you gotta know small things also count You better put your feet on the ground And see what it's about' ...( Courtesy Objection tango)

Ignorance isn’t bliss in any way! No wonder the country still remains a third world country even after so much economic growth.

China might be rising as the east rises but not India at this rate, with just only a few elite ones, while the rest continue to happily live in the dark-in ignorance, illiteracy and so on. Not the high class and a few knowledgeable ones I am talking about here!

There are a few who are responsible for taking the country forward. But there are too many who love to live in the dark. The ratio must be 20:80 and that's not too good.

By the way, only a good education, class and increase of intellectualism, knowledge and wisdom can make people progressive in life. Knowing oneself is being enlightened while knowing others is being wise. But sadly many don’t have either. Well that’s being tried for but more needs to be done not just in India but everywhere as well.

Otherwise a kind of an ‘Avatar’ like world will become a reality where again a few intellectually and technically powerful people will dominate the majority!


On another note, they might be from a totally different field, but I always felt proud to see Assamese American engineer Renita Saikia Fincke keep her traditions alive. She's originally from the North East Indian state- Assam.

Well, that's my home state in India and some people there have some Mongoloid and Siamese roots.That explains my exotic look as well which has stood me in good stead. Of course Renita gets lots of help from her NASA astronaut husband Col. Edward Michael Fincke better known as Mike Fincke.

He did the the state's most famous Bihu dance in space and enjoyed his time in the north eastern state last year where he was felicitated. The spring festival dance has never featured in a mainstream Bollywood film, but reached space. That sure is incredible.


He loves the river Brahmaputra in Assam and filmed it from space.He also took many pics of the North east and it's scenic beauty from the space station.

Their children who speak various languages and have Assamese-American names, seem to have the best of both worlds- the advancement of the west and the mystique of the east! Kudos to you guys!



P.S.- You guys might be curious but Babetude's personal pics will be shared on the blog only when the time is right and the news is big enough:-) She ain't a celeb and vanity is not her thing.


Till then, ciao.

Love Barack!

The movie( Love, Barack) which also has an infamous Indian actress in it, is not out yet and is still under production. But I was bound to use it as a headline for my new post.

The US president's recent trip to Asia was quite successful.

There were loads of political meetings and summits that happened too.But the psrsonal touch he put into it once again shows why Barack Obama is one of the most liked American the world over. Yes, much like Abraham Lincoln.

Well, even if one agrees that he has his detractors (like the conservative and orthodox types in the US and other countries that might have problems with him), but the fact remains that his warm demeanour, the positive vibes he exudes and his way of connecting with human beings can make them warm up to him easily.

Now the little jig he did with some kids in Mumbai, India was much talked about when it happened and has become hugely popular online

Well, the first lady Michelle has been praised for her rythm and style. But by putting his foot forward the president showed yet and left no doubts as to why he's liked so much the world over.

Take a look...

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Well, some avid watchers and reporters talked about the president's robot like moves, much like the old time non dancer from Indian movies Dharmendra with his 'jat yamla pagla deewana' song.

But this sure is enough to bring smile to anyone's lips. So it was not just the kids' hearts that were won that day.

The visit to the Mahatma Gandhi's resting place, the old fort in Delhi, the address to the Indian parliament and Lady Michelle's advice to school girls were other heart warming highlights.

Same goes for Indonesia where the president had spent four of his young years. There were many emotional trips down memory lane and bonding in that country too. At the Asia Pacific Economic Cooperation (APEC) summit there were a few friendly talks about technology and so on.

There'll be talks of humanoids and andriods a lot, but it's really nice to talk more about the humane nature of the president.


The accomplishments at the G-20 summit in Seoul mightn't be a lot but emotional accompliments were indeed many! No wonder he's a much loved American president internationally and is sure to become a historical icon in future.

And that way he and his graceful wife are being widely followed by the media( every little move can make news) all the time which otherwise likes to obsess about conventional good lookers( apart from glam stars from the entertainment world) like Prince William and Kate Middleton(more recently) and the likes of Lady Diana, President Kennedy, Jackie Kennedy in the past!

When the face is the fortune...

The face is the index of the mind. The face can say a million stories and also reflect what on the person's mind. Face readers could tell you that! There are some who would recognize that from day one and would either be proud of their beauty or work hard on the beautification process- try and try and try to look young and beautiful as long as they could. And for people from showbiz( read actors, models and the like) it's even more important. Well their face gets them the moolah, the fame etc.

Hence the face is the fortune, more so in the entertainment industry. But then one must always admit that beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder.And most importantly the concept of beauty has changed over the years. And it for sure varies from country to country. In the earlier days of cinema too, the concept of beauty was different. A more conventionally beautiful face was liked by audiences and people as a whole. There wasn't much talk about hot and sexy in those days. The women had fuller figures. They didn't care too much about proportion or a washboard tummy or strong shapely legs during those days!



Indian actress Sadhana(pictured above) was considered one of the most beautiful heroines of her time when she came into limelight. Her Audrey Hepburn inspired fringe came to be known as the Sadhana cut in the early sixties. She defined fashion at that time with her tight churidar kurtas. I'm sure there were many men during those times who drooled over her stunning beauty. But one stroke of bad luck changed it all. The fringe remained but things changed by the late sixties for the actress. Sadhana is said to have had a major thyroid problem and more so it affected her eyes which were considered the most beautiful features on her face. There's much talk about the problem even now as there were( and still are on some discussions boards and articles online) talks about her having protruding eyes and a bloated face on screen.

The misfortune has been credited to exophthalmic goitre (Thyroid related problem) by some who did the research on her condition. She had moved to Boston for eye treatment and when she came back, it's said she lost many offers. How hard it must have been for the once upon a time beauty! 'Inteqaam' in 1969, "Ek Phool Do Mali" in 1969, "Geeta Mera Naam" were some of her post thyroid films and the difference was clearly seen. By the end of it, only the fringe was there and the charm was gone. It didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out the difference. After the film "Geeta Mera Naam" she stopped acting saying she wanted her fans to remember her as a beautiful young lady. She was barely seen in media circles after that. She went through miscarriages but remained with husband RK Nayyar as long as he lived.

Well, after a long sabbatical she recently got photographed by the media(that's around 35 years later, some two months back to watch her relative Kareena Kapoor's 'We are Family') with some of her old colleagues- Waheeda Rehman,Nanda, Helen and the late Raj Kapoor's wife Krishna Raj Kapoor. They all have gotten old but Sadhana the one time classic beauty has fared the worst. She's become almost unrecognizable( picture below, Sadhana is on extreme right alongside Nanda, Helen and Waheeda Rehman). Well, Sadhana's transformation has been almost complete. It happens to a lot of people and old age is inevitable, but time particularly is cruel to some even more.

We tend to talk about actors and models more often just because they are in the limelight most of the time. Talking of actors, even Sadhana's cousin Babita( Kareena's mother) hasn't aged gracefully. But in Babita's case all that happened after she quit the movies to marry into the Kapoor family and have her actress daughters Karisma and Kareena.

If it happens at the height of one's career, it's really very unfortunate and sad. That way,the few celebs that have aged gracefully are really lucky. It's Diwali( the festival of lights) time, time to remove ignorance(lighting up should actually signify that). I love the spirit of this festival and it's not just a religious time, but a time to light up and make your surroundings happy and beautiful too. And maybe I'm depressing you guys a little with some depressing talk.

But that's the reality of life and maybe we all need to talk about all that a bit. In Hollywood, the worst sufferer of something very unfortunate of that sort is my all time favorite classic actor Montgomery Clift.

Sometimes really terrible things happen to nice people. Monty Clift had a wonderfully chiseled face which captivated the hearts of millions. But one vcar crash one night in the mid 50s changed it all. It was a heart wrecking story and that coupled with some of his other psychological issues and social constraints of that time subsequently led to the sensitive actor's self destruction.



While driving back from very close friend Liz Taylor's home in the mid fifties, Clift's car hit a post and the front side crashed completely.Taylor had to take two of his teeth stuck in his throat to save his life and prevent him from choking. A long spell at the hospital did cure him but his handsome face changed forever.

And he took to drug and alcohol addiction after that to ease the pain from the accident. At that time he was shooting for 'Raintree County' and many went to see the film just to see the two different faces of Clift. It was only a downward spiral after that for the sensitive and talented method actor who was so dedicated to his art. The poor guy indeed went through a lot and my heart breaks to even talk about it.Life can be really cruel to very good people sometimes too.



Well, this video shows the transformation a bit too.



In modern times,there have been botched plastic surgeries wreaking havoc.

It's worst for a celeb. I remember when an Indian TV actress met with a terrible car crash some years back. Later she said how grateful she was that her face was saved.

She made quite a successful comeback but had grown older and had put on some weight by then and only ended up getting elderly roles from then on. Still she had reasons to be grateful.

An Indian starlet went through a major trauma just two years back when it appeared she had a botched nose job followed by a unnatural brow lift and lip work(made them look too big).

She found many detractors at that time( people can be really cruel when anyone is down and out) who called her plastic, an alien and the desi Michael Jackson. Thankfully with proper medical help she got over it all and is doing quite well with some international work too( though she doesn't look all that natural any more and there's something made up/ artificial about her face). But kudos to her bravery.

I remember when I was very young, one of our teachers, a nun had said," Don't be too proud of beauty. One bout of chicken pox and it would end. Instead try being a good person."

I recalled that almost all the time when I actually got it not too long ago and was terrified. A few others have reported feeling the same during an illness of that sort which temporarily disfigures one. Believe me, it's a disgusting feeling mixed with fear, apprehension and sadness.


Well, I always try to be a better person and value my good heart but valued my face too which brought me far in my life( in terms of work and betterment of life) though I never considered myself conventionally very beautiful. Others calling you pretty, sexy or beautiful is better than blowing your own trumpet.

One needs to be grateful to God, is they have some of that. Looking good helps to build one's overall personality too.

Thankfully the nightmare got over and I could look nice again.

In life nothing is permanent and the same goes for beauty. Many people have lost theirs with age.

So ego and arrogance over it makes no sense at all. In fact one should enjoy it gracefully as long as it lasts and maybe try to make it last( even by natural means) as long as they can. And then age gracefully for sure, physically, mentally and spiritually.

Well,only the truly wise have come to terms with and accepted this fact!

And Ash goes on...

This woman sure is a one of a kind Indian actress. She turns a year older today and is happily on the wrong side of 30. But that hasn't bothered her physically( she still looks like a million bucks) or caused anything negative to happen in her career.

All that in an industry where age is such an important issue. Most actresses are shown the door the moment they turn 30( the problem is that they look it too!). Being around till 32/33 is nothing short of a miracle.

Of course marrying into the Indian film industry's first family has helped. But that's more like the icing on the cake as Ash was always meant to be right up there. Babetude felt it as a little girl in the early and mid 90s when this Grey Green eyed beauty was first seen in the Indian media and feels the same till now. I never really cared about what her detractors felt.

After all, I feel that most people dislike Ash just because of pure envy. Many want to be her and they can't be her and usually it's seen in life that resentment stems out of something like that. Very few people are like Babetude who has logical reasons behind not liking someone. I'm proud that as a woman I never really disliked anyone in the media or otherwise out of envy( it's great to unlike so many people who become petty because of that). I want and wanted to like people for what they are( good human beings) apart from being achievers. And some people just exuded negative vibes( and I was always right, thank God for the instinct, wish I had used it more) and were out of my list of good people I like..

But Ash was different. She's a very beautiful woman who's handled her career very well from day one and also maintained her family values as a daughter, sister and now as a daughter-in-law. I feel she'll make a great mother too and really hope something of that sorts happens soon.

So in short, there's no logical reason to hate her. In fact one should be proud that she can look good and rock regardless of her age. One of her favorite directors Sanjay Leela Bhansali is calling her 'timeless' now.

And yes, this lady is very international which is such an important aspect.I remember walking by Madame Tussuad in New York and meeting a white guy doing promotions for the museum. While talking of Indian actors, this guy got confused with Amitabh Bachchan's name but he remembered Aishwarya well and went on to explain how her statue was borrowed from the London museum for few days.

Will Smith, Julia Roberts, Oprah etc have been the more famous personalities who showered praise on her!


Like many others she takes my breath away with her new dance number from the eagerly awaited Sanjay Leela Bhansali movie 'Guzaarish'...


At this rate she will set a record soon of being the first Indian actress with such a long spanning career.

Keep up the good work, girl. A little girl or guy( meaning a baby) in her life will surely make this lovely lady come full circle now!!!

Wish you a very Happy B'day with health, happiness, long life and so on, now and always.